You don’t get that sort of nonsense from Jamie Oliver. Read more...
Wednesday, 26 September 2007
CLARISSA EXPLAINS IT ALL
You don’t get that sort of nonsense from Jamie Oliver. Read more...
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Labels: animals, clarissa dickson wright, food, hunting, jamie oliver, tv
FRENCHING SAUNDERS
There’s a lengthy interview in today’s Guardian about the show, which is, bizarrely, co-written with House Of Tiny Tearaways’ child-rearing expert Tanya Byron and which spoofs shows like Jeremy Kyle. I’m watching a preview of it tonight so I’ve yet to see if it lives up to its promise, but here’s an excerpt which explains why she’s at the top of my admirational mountain. (Yes, I’ve got one. And what.)
"We wanted it to look like a European art film, but on a low budget. We got a director [Rupert Jones] who had absolutely no experience of shooting TV comedy. The way it looks and the way the character is treated are much more to do with Woody Allen and Pedro Almodóvar than with Absolutely Fabulous."
I think it’s love.
Read the full thing here.
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Labels: absolutely fabulous, chat shows, comedy, jennifer saunders, vivienne vyle
REASONS TO LOVE JANICE #967
Here's Janice visiting the site of Gianni Versace’s murder:
If there was a religion centred around her batshit-insanity, with Tyra Banks voodoo dolls and Everything About Me Is Fake… And I’m Perfect as its holy text, I’d be out on the streets canvassing like a Scientologist. She is God.
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12:07
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Labels: america's next top model, fashion, janice dickinson, perez
MISSY: SUPA DUPA INTO DORITOS
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11:50
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Labels: crisps, jezebel, missy elliott
Tuesday, 18 September 2007
IT'S BEEN A WHILE, CHUMPS...
They say it's a "total embarrassment". I say it's kind of awesome. Tomatoes, tomatoes.
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09:32
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Labels: american idol, beth ditto, gossip, trash, tv
Monday, 10 September 2007
TODAY WE LIKE: L'IL KIM
And since you clicked through and I can't turn that fucking feature off, have some L'il Kim facts: she's 4' 11"! Her middle name is Denise! Paris is a pussy - Kimberly Denise got a 366-day sentence for perjury!
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polyester
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16:56
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Labels: diva, lil kim, music, song of the day
CUT!
Given that even Jodie Foster won’t talk about being gay, or even being outed (she gave a juicy quote to Entertainment Weekly on that magazine cover… oh, hold on, she said “no comment”. Yawn), this sounds pretty cool.
Except that now, the people behind the Wachowskis’ new movie Speed Racer are denying the whole sex change thing. There’s a probing piece about it on Cinematical, which pretty much implies that Speed Racer bosses want to avoid “negative publicity” around the film. The site earlier reported that Lana would not be allowed to handle the movie’s publicity, for fear of alienating an audience.
Excuse the righteousness, but every time something about trannys, homos, dykes, queers, lezzos, poofs or fags crops up in Hollywood, it reverts right back to the silent era. Because that sort of thing doesn’t exist in the entertainment business. Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.
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16:47
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Labels: film, gay, jodie foster, stupid, wachowskis
THINGS NOT TO DO IN GERMANY #1
And killing Jews and gays. Cooooool.”
OK, I embellished. She still got sacked, though.
Posted by
polyester
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16:43
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Labels: europe, jeremy kyle, politics, stupid
SARAH SWOON-VERMAN
Look out for the bit where she turns her face into a vagina.
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16:37
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Labels: britney, funny, sarah silverman, swoon, vagina face
WRITERS: THICK
Polish pulp writer Krystian Bala, on the other hand, has just been sentenced to 25 years in prison for his role in the abduction, torture and murder of his wife’s alleged lover, which he then recounted in suspiciously perfect detail in his next thriller. Like, duh.
Still, if it’s good enough for OJ Simpson…
Thursday, 6 September 2007
TWATTOOS
But Jase clearly has tat taste, because he’s just got a giant ‘Mariah’ inked across his tum – in honour of Mimi, obv:
“I grew up loving her, and now that I know her, I love her even more. I know I'll never regret it, so that's why I got it.”
Girl is fierce.
[via Jezebel, image via Perez Hilton]
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polyester
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16:12
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Wednesday, 5 September 2007
SAINT WINEHOUSE
Pope Benedict XVI joined the clamour of praise for the singer today by offering Winehouse a beatitude, adding: “If she can prove she’s performed a miracle (other than turning up for a gig) we’ll waive the whole ‘death’ part and promote her straight to Saint.”
LADIES, LOVE YOUR LABIA
Two funny things involving the word ‘labia’:
1. If you go to Rome on the train, you get off in a coach station and there’s a bus going to Labia. It’s written in big on the front.
2. My lip balm has got ‘labial’ down the side, presumably for those non-English speaking European Spanish types. I find it amusing. I’m puerile and proud.
Something less funny: ‘labiaplasty’. Cosmetic surgery on lady-parts has increased over 400 per cent in the US over the past 10 years, and doctors are concerned at the lack of safety procedures in place. Meaning you could end up with a minnie less attractive than Wino’s track marks.
But better still is Newsweek’s headline: ‘Be careful down there’. As if you could accidentally slice off bits of, um, your bits.
You know America has that ‘Got milk?’ poster campaign? Get female celebs to pose, legs akimbo, with the slogan: 'Filles, stop fiddling with your fannies!'
You can have that one for free.
[via Consumerist]
TODAY WE LIKE: JOHN ET JEHN
Because they are a bit French.
And that is a motto for every walk of life.
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Labels: france, john et jehn, music, song of the day